A Man’s way of thinking….

So yesterday Alex and I head off to my parents’ house. I had ordered a replacement cell phone & as we share a family plan it ships to the billing location. Away we go….

5 mins prior to walking out of the house I noted that my jeans felt quite tight, but that was likely because they had just come out of the dryer. No big deal, right?!?!?

In the car, A is driving. As he adjusts the radio volumne down I note this is because he wants to talk. (He only turns the volumn down when he wants to talk.) I look at him expectantly, but for an odd moment he doesnt open his mouth. And then . . .this comes out. “ifyouthinkyourjeansaretotightmaybeyoushouldgoonadiet” I took a moment to translate this and then just stared at him.

Excuse me? Did you just say what I think you said? Because I know that with me worried about fitting into my wedding dress and the fact that I already have some issues that are body image related that you did NOT just tell me that.

At this point he glances at me and then the following conversation occurs:
“Well our relationship is built on honesty and we’ve agreed to always be honest with one another. And you just didnt seem happy that you might have to go up a jeans size. I’m just trying to help!”
“Dear – no woman in her right mind is going to appreciate a fiance, husband, s.o.’s help of ‘well just go on a diet'”
“why not? its not like a big deal, so you need to eat less & do crunches, no big deal. Sides you arent fat.”
“Oh my god. I cannot believe you think this way. . .I’m so done with this conversation. I appreciate the attempt at help, but in the future just tell me you think I am beautiful.”
“You are being ridiculous.”

Now we get to my ‘rents house about now & the first thing my mother notices is that I am 1. not looking so happy and 2. alex is looking put out. So she asks the loving question of “what happened?” Alex relates the story along the lines of, well she just didnt want to go up a jeans size so I offered a few suggestions on how to avoid that. To which I laughed. Then I gave a more detailed explanation.
“Mom, he told me to go on a diet after I mentioned my jeans were a little tight.”

At this point my father walked in, looked at A and said…”come into my office and lets talk about how to reply to women.”

That was my evening. Yours?


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