A husband’s "Man Cave"

I read several blogs, written by talented wives, to try to understand that funny species otherwise known as “The Husband.” In doing so I’ve learned a few notable items over the past several months:

1. All men share a single brain that they pass around. Some use it more frequently than others, but nonetheless share it with the remainder of the species.
2. They think nothing of beating their chests to declare they are man, they are the “hunter,” so forth so on and yet when sent on a “Hunt” to the fridge, grocery store, fill in the _____ holiday to obtain wife’s gift with picture, ISBN, and exact location within the store inevitably they will be unable to locate said item.
3. In referencing back to item 2, when they in turn need the wife to “hunt” they think nothing at all of providing a description akin to “babe, while you are at _____ please pick me up that favorite thing I love. You know what I mean. Its smaller than a beer case and it used to be in a black wrapper but its now in something different and I have no idea what its called, but you know what I mean.” 

4. If it has no defined, illustrated, with directions they can ignore, purpose….its trash.

That, my friends, is the sum total of a man’s logic. Its really quite simple to follow once you understand the basic principles. Men are like children, accept this fact now and be resigned to the fact that you will from now on play your own spouse when it comes to gift giving, shopping, and parenting. Now don’t get me wrong. I love my hubby. I would not give him up or trade him for anyone else, but this “logic” amuses me. Now mind you – I, being a female, seeing nothing wrong with owning 20 pairs of shoes. Something that just throws Alex’s poor mind for a loop. 🙂

Now to explain the title: in shopping for the house, what do you suppose was the first thought process my darling hubby had? Was it – we have a lawn, we need a lawn mower? Or perhaps it might have been “the house needs new floors desperately – we’ll save up and get those in ASAP” Oh no. None of the above, no his first thought was “Hey I get a man – cave! Now I can buy that Jeep Wrangler grill wall mounted light and put that and my PS2 and the t.v. in there so you can watch t.v.” Of course sweetheart, lets not forget the stove needs replacing immediately and those various other silly things and lets go ahead and buy that wall light that looks like the front end of the car you drive every day and what you work on almost every day at work.  Brilliant! I’ll go shopping for my new shoes while you are picking up the light!

Its just one of those quirks of fate I suppose. How two total opposing forces can attract one another. I have me a GRIT (gentleman raised in the south), a true southern man, who always holds his elbow out for me to tuck my arm into, opens the door, and in general treats me as though I’m made of a fine bone china. But I also have a bone-headed, stubborn fool who refuses to ask for help or realize that when the store we’ve been to 50 times is ahead on the left does not mean turning right here will be a “shortcut” just because his buddy told him so. And despite all that – it works. 


One response to “A husband’s "Man Cave"

  1. Welcome to the world of womanly wisdom! Your southern man operates the same as my northwestern man. What I've also learned is that the further advanced their age does not translate into an increase in brain usage. Oh well.Oops ~ time to go shopping! Mama needs a new pair of shoes! ;