Has Marriage gone the way of the bikini?

Hey Everyone! Two seconds before I get started. I just need to get out this dusty ol’ wooden box upon which to stand for a brief moment. (gets out dusty wooden box, swipes at it with a dust rag, before setting a microphone in front of it and climbing on top)

Excuse me for just a minute but I need to climb up on my high horse, soap box, whatever may have you. It appears lately that marriage and cheating and divorces have become the topic du jour by many entities. And some of its good news and some of its bad, but that doesn’t mean that this information is not everywhere we choose to look. It’s in our media on the television, in our newspapers, in our magazines, and on our internet, and even in our fictional entertainment. You see it at home, at work, at the grocery store, and at the local big box store. You hear about it in the bathroom, in the checkout line, and at the playground. It’s EVERYWHERE. And somehow, in the midst of all of this the idea of marriage has not only become a laughing stock, but that the concept of cheating has not only become normal BUT accepted AND expected by “the modern man.” Why we’ve even come up with acceptable “addictions” for this habit.

Now let me point out that I fully and wholeheartedly believe that marriage as a legal document can AND should be open to all people. It’s a legal contract and no one of age should be barred from this. I also believe that there are different types of committed relationships and no two are alike. Lastly, I believe that there are people out there who truly suffer from an addiction to the high that is brought upon by illegal, illicit, or otherwise unacceptable behavior and that it is as strong an addiction as those who find chemicals having controlling over them. I do NOT however, find it acceptable that the moment a celebrity or a person down the street, or heck your mother’s brother’s wife’s cousin’s uncle or aunt goes outside the sanctity of a chosen agreement (marriage or otherwise) that we can slap a common idiom on it and say oh well. Forgive and forget right? In doing so I feel that society as a whole has chosen to lessen the value of that commitment. What good is a commitment if at a moment when it is broken you can 1. Not acknowledge that the actions have indeed breached said agreement and 2. Say something to the effect of “it’s not my fault because I had an addiction” or “you didn’t provide for me” or “it takes two to tango baby” and re-assign the blame. Society does not allow the abuser to get away with that behavior. Society does not allow the drag racer racing down the interstate to keep going 100+ MPH because they cannot help it. So why do we continue to allow this travesty?

I do not claim to know the answers AT ALL. I do not claim to have a solution. I do not claim to be without faults or issues myself. I simply am amazed at what we, as a society, and it takes the society for this to become such a norm that it is prevalent EVERYWHERE, no longer seem to have an issue with such actions. Instead we find them as entertainment. It’s no wonder the divorce rate is sky rocketing. How can children be taught that marriage is not to be entered into lightly because it is a legally and emotionally binding contract if those of us who must provide the example do not first think before we take action. It is a commitment that you AND your partner must first define the rules and then uphold. You must both work on it. Yes sometimes divorce is the answer. Cheating isn’t. Kindergarten taught us these basic rules. Say you’re sorry, do not cheat, ask permission, treat others as you want to be treated, and naps are a good thing among others. Where did we all forget those simple acts of common courtesy?

(climbs off box and shoves back into the dark corner). I apologize if you found that offensive because honestly my goal is not to offend. However, look around next time you are at the grocery store. You’re right those magazines are garbage. Garbage that makes MILLIONS each year because we are buying it up. So while I rarely climb up on that box, it offends the very core of me to hear anyone say that you do not blame the person for cheating because they were not provided for. If that is the case and nothing is helping GET OUT. Act like the adult that you are. When in life did “nana nana boo boo” or poking someone because they poked back solve issues?

Do you think that this trend can be revered or do you think that the strength of a binding contract like marriage has gone the way of bikinis? Going, going, gone. (now cue the upset comments)


One response to “Has Marriage gone the way of the bikini?

  1. I am totally with you. I feel really sad for people in marriages who feel it is ok to cheat on their spouse because they “feel something is missing”. Go to a counselor, and if that doesn’t help then discuss a divorce. At least be an adult about it.