Ugh…so I went shopping today and it was by far the most frustrating experience I’ve had since bathing suit season. Yes, I realize that was only like three months ago, but bear with me here. Please?
I am a bridesmaid in just three (ok two-ish but three is a closer look) weeks and the dress I am wearing is lovely. Really it is, it’s a dark plum, strapless, long, and super slinky yet fun. The frustration with this dress is mostly my own fault as it fits my hips which are about oh…two or more sizes larger than my top half. As such I need the dress fitted for my smaller assets. So I found shoes. Really awesome and cute shoes too! Now all I need to find is my “over the shoulder boulder holder” (name that movie!….and seriously, if you can WITHOUT looking it up I am mightily impressed) that fits the dress right? And I’ll admit, makes me look good. I am vain. I admit this. Who doesn’t want to look good? Should be simple right? Turns out I was a little bit off in this thinking.
So away I went to the local mall. To Dillard’s since, in my honest opinion, they have the best selection of what I needed of any of the large mall stores. Now I know I’ve changed sizes recently so I grab several choices and head off to the dressing room. First attempt leads to laughter and amazement that women are supposed to get into those “suck you up, tuck you in, and lift ’em high while fastening from the back” numbers all by yourself. I think I might have done a few yoga moves while negotiating that one. Second attempt was the fasten, scoot, wiggle and scoop move. Great except when I breathed out and the :: ahem :: tides fell back. Third attempt somehow managed to be both one and two. Still not sure exactly what happened there.
Shopping makes me delirious.
So after multiple failures I get decent enough to open the door of my spot and exchange what I have for alternates. However, as I open the door I see a “professional fitter” and I decide what-the-heck I’ll ASK for help.
Now, its my understanding that they are to measure you and using some formula decide your size. This lady takes one look at me and goes you are a D cup. Excuse me? HECK YEA! I’ve never been a D cup in my life. Imagine how lucky I am to not only be a D cup, prayers have been answered, but also find the lady who doesn’t even need to measure me. She’s got that much experience she can eyeball it.
So away she goes, and ladies you’ll get what I’m talking about here more than the men, as she comes back I notice she has items ranging from 32DD all the way up to 38C. O.K. I get it. The gals, they fluctuate. We all fluctuate. Heck I may have gotten really lucky and packed on some unbeknownst to me curves lately, but there is NO WAY I have that big of a possible curve. Still, benefit of the doubt and desperation reign so I go with the flow.
Only the D cup. It was a Dud cup. Next one up was a B cup. That one was a bit of a bust so to speak. Then all of a sudden we yank out the DD cup. I’m sure you can guess what kind doomed disaster that sucker ended up being. (you see the odd choices here?)
20 try-ons later I’m pretty sure of a few things:
1. This gal is either brand new or doesn’t really give a dang about actually helping me.
2. I’m not spending that much money on an item that only “kinda” fits
3. My hubby is better at shopping for this kind for me of thing than I evidently am. Which is sad ladies. Sad.
So after thank the woman for her time I head out of there so I can get back to work without pushing my time limit for my lunch break with a lack of shopping bags. Which I really hate to do when I actually have a purpose and permission to spend money.
So in saying all this….does anyone have any ideas, thoughts, advice, store suggestions. The biggest and most important thing is strapless bridesmaid gown that I must get fitted this weekend. Which means I have to buy at a store this item. So friends…family…readers…HELP! I thank you greatly in advance.
I’d also like to apologize, if you managed to get through that whole post, on the lack of insightful sharing I have. However, I gotta keep it real and this is really all I have going on right now. But man is it a doozy!