Are you great at sharing how you feel? I am…guess that’s the whole female aspect of me. Alex on the other hand…not so much. However, thanks to Alex getting in touch with his feelings I now have six more chickens in our house. That’s right; Alex’s feelings go together with chickens and our kitchen.
According to Merriam-Webster one of the definitions of a MAN (noun) is “d (1) : one possessing in high degree the qualities considered distinctive of manhood (2) obsolete : the quality or state of being manly : manliness.”
Let me just tell y’all, in case you might have somehow missed it (doubtful since I have the smartest readers in all of the interwebs) but Alex. He’s a MANS man. The man prefers plaid shirts, denim, and cowboy boots any day of the week. The attendance at formal occasions is decided upon once he determines if he can wear his boots or not. His preferred gift of choice as both the receiver (and the giver….ask him about my first Christmas gift y’all from him) is a car part or a tool. He’s a beer-drinkin, handy, callus-handed Man’s Man.
So to get him to talk about his feelings is um…well akin to pulling teeth from a ticked off mule. Difficult at best. Oh don’t get me wrong, Alex is great at telling me he loves me. That’s about it though. No other emotions leak through that tough-shell. In fact more often than not he shows me his love rather than getting all mushie gushie on me and actually talking about them! So on Sunday when I broke down in tears when all I could get out of Alex was a “well I’m bummed” we didn’t um…react to each other well. In fact he got frustrated because he couldn’t FIX the situation and I got mad because all I wanted from him was a HUG and a slight understanding of the myriad of fears roiling around us right now.
Once we both separated I quickly figured out he was probably frustrated because he couldn’t fix things and I was mad because he wasn’t reading my mind. Whoopsie! So, like any other modern couple, we exchanged texts while searching for each other in a huge antique mart.
It took a few minutes of being near one another and walking side by side to breach the walls of upset, but by the time we walked out Alex said I love You, I’m trying and I’m here for you without words six times over.
Alex may not give a flying hoot what the interior of our house looks like and I’m pretty dang sure he also doesn’t see why on earth we need napkin rings. Especially napkin rings that match our curtains! But he knows I am silly like that and so without saying a word he grabbed these Chicks for me and now they live in our cabinet. (You know the one he surprised me with for my birthday.) I didn’t hear the words “I love you” or “I’m sorry” spoken out loud. But my Man’s Man….he got the message to me loud and clear.
How do you share your feelings? Are you a talker, like me? Or a shower, like Alex?